Once upon a time, in a parallel universe very much like ours, there were two private WoW servers. They had comparable populations and about the same level of development. For a while, they existed in peace since the private scene was small, players were loyal to their projects, and the general population of normies had little idea that private servers existed.
However, this couldn’t last, and after a series of cataclysmic events that included nostalgia, competent marketing, and France, the scene was changed forever. Tens of thousands of new players poured in, but many new servers were started as well — often, a week wouldn’t pass without a new project announcing its launch. Competition kept increasing, and the two older servers that once ruled the scene started to feel the pressure. Players were leaving for the new, exciting “fresh”, and something had to be done.
In an attempt to attract new players and keep the existing ones, the two servers introduced a number of drastic reforms, each set of reforms being radically opposed to one another. One project embraced capitalism and renamed itself Capitalist WoW, and the other went full communism, changing its name to Communist WoW. Some argued that the names weren’t imaginative, but the owners wanted there to be no doubt what their servers are about. Clear, in your face branding was key in a ruthless market the private scene had turned into.
Capitalist WoW
All gear in the game became BoE. Every time a boss was killed, the gear would be openly auctioned and sold to the highest bidder, making every run into was was previously known as “GDKP”.
Those who lacked skill but had plenty of gold could buy their way into most difficult raids, and the best tanks, healers, and the rarest type of player, excellent damage dealers, were getting paid massive amounts just to show up to raids. Most of the time, the currency was in-game gold, but sometimes they’d be paid in dollars, euros, Swiss francs, and Norwegian krones. A few players were known to be making a living solely from raiding and raid leading — including a young family of four where everyone but the baby played WoW to pay off the mortgage (which they did).
Not only gear and services, but characters were freely sold too. The project’s website had a system that allowed the trade of characters, gold, and all items that weren’t equipped. Goods could be traded in any way players wanted, and if there was a RL monetary exchange involved, the server would take a small cut of the money. The system was made in a way that minimized a chance of scams, but all trades were final, and each player was fully responsible for their own decisions. The general consensus was that if someone’s incompetent enough to get scammed, they deserve it, and occasional appeals and cries for help were collectively laughed at.
The entire in-game world was a PVP zone; all sanctuary areas were removed. To make up for it, NPC guards in cities like Shattrath and Dalaran were buffed, but a faction could still control the area with a 40 man raid or two. This, however, only happened rarely since the only reward for doing so was lulz. There was no material incentive for it.
The opposite was true for world PVP. In order to make herbs more important, all flasks were buffed by 500%, and all the raid bosses were buffed in ways that required far more damage and healing to down them. This made them unkillable without flasks, and to raise the value of flasks, the amount of herb spawns was drastically reduced as well.
That forced the guilds, previously just mere conglomerates of individuals wanting to improve their gear, to organize themselves and work together, so they could raid at all. Each guild had teams of players who specialized in herbalism, often working in shifts, who would comb the world for hours, looking for new spawns and fighting the opposing faction in the process. What used to be a boring activity now lead into intense battles that made herb-rich areas into battlegrounds: most herbalists were actually PVP-ers. Friendships were made, videos were recorded, resulting Discord rage was surreal, and above all, players had a reason to log in. Herbalists would, of course, be rewarded for their work with gold and raid gear.
Mining was just as intense. To make it meaningful, crafted gear was buffed to match endgame raid and PVP items, and the amount of ore spawns was, again, reduced. This provided an alternative way to progress: a player could choose to not raid and just play the mining game instead, which, just like the herbalist one, included lots of cooperation, PVP, and drama. Entire PVP guilds were made to trade materials with raiding guilds, so those who disliked PVP but enjoyed raiding could simply kill bosses on regular basis and trade the gear for materials.
Capitalist WoW had near-complete freedom of speech. Players were allowed to discuss any topic in whatever way they pleased, and the only reason for a mute or ban was spamming or doxing. Even so, the chat remained relatively civil since everyone had a reputation to maintain. if too many people considered you toxic, you’d have a hard time trading or getting into a good guild. If someone proved to be too annoying for enough people, they’d be dealt with by being repeatedly ganked until they shut up.
Goldshire offered a fine selection of adult RP-ers both amateur and professional. Women, men, and everything in between would mingle in complete freedom, engaging in voluntary transactions, so to speak, of their desires. While the place was mostly used for relaxation after a long night of raiding or gathering materials, there were rumors of new couples being made in the Goldshire inn or at some remote spot in Elwynn forest. Almost no one would admit actually visiting the place, but it was there, open for everyone, and oh so busy at all times.
Communist WoW
While a great game, WoW always had a problem of elitism: selfish players who can farm endgame raids and get high arena ratings. They think they’re better than everyone else and parade around with their gear — as if getting it was some kind of an incredible achievement. In reality, clearing raids and winning arena games is easy for them because they always have good gear from previous tiers and seasons. They’re also members of successful guilds that refuse to recruit anyone who isn’t as lucky as them, and so such unlucky players are left with nothing. What can a player with no gear and no friends do? They’re unfairly blocked from playing the game, and the team at Communist WoW decided to stop that injustice once and for all.
Upon being looted, all blues and epics would be transfered to the central bank. Players were still allowed to loot greens and lower quality items, but everything above that was seized and redistributed to assure maximum fairness. Redistribution was handled by the staff, and players were unable to see the contents of the central bank since there really was no need for it. After all, it was the staff that had a vision of a better server based on equality and justice, and there was no reason to doubt their judgment. In fact, anyone doing so was probably a toxic troll and/or a Capitalist WoW agitator who needed to be swiftly removed.
The same was true for mining and herbalism. Players were encouraged to gather as much as possible to provide enough materials for everyone, including players who didn’t have the time to farm (or simply didn’t learn a gathering profession). Everyone would receive resource tokens every week, and these tokens could then be redeemed for ores and herbs on the server’s website. Because the amount of materials was limited, players often had to wait for several days — or longer — for their tokens to be processed and turned into profession goods. Of course, no one complained about the so called “Titanium lines”, a term most likely coined by a Capitalist WoW infiltrator that claimed the wait for a single Titanium stack has now stretched over 8 months. Only a paid shill would try to complain about the world’s most progressive server.
All PVP was disabled due to being elitist. The initial idea was to allow it and redistribute the honor and arena points, but that turned out to not be enough. Certain players would, for some reason, continue winning the majority of games, making other players feel bad about themselves and continuing the tradition of toxic elitism that Communist WoW was determined to end. The “I hate PVP” soon become a popular maxim among the players, and anyone suspected of not agreeing would soon be reported to the staff.
Speech was heavily regulated. Any form of racism, sexism, ableism, ageism, toxic masculinity, and trans-exclusionary language was bannable — along with expressions of white, male, and cis privilege. The staff also worked hard on developing a system that would automatically detect such hate speech though its introduction kept getting delayed for unknown causes.
All actions by the staff were to promote fairness and fight elitism. Players adored them and wrote lengthy posts on forums and Discord about how great the server is, and how excellent specific staff members are at doing their jobs. Donations were optional, but were really common even though the project had no item shop. Sadly, agitators from Capitalist WoW would spread rumors about how donators are rewarded with gold, items, and even services like getting a specific player banned.
Some went even further and claimed that the server owner is trading sexual favors in exchange for a legendary weapon. The horrendous account described how a young man, in return for a Shadowmourne, agreed to move in with the owner to live under his bed while taking estrogen, slowly turning into a girl while playing WoW all day and servicing the owner at night. The rumors were suppressed, and no one dared to wonder how come there’s a ret paladin with Shadowmourne on a server where all legendaries are banned.
~ FIN ~
I hope you’ve enjoyed the post!
Which server sounds more appealing to you: Capitalist WoW or Communist WoW?
Do you think their representations are correct, or is there something you’d add?
Since we just had two serious posts in a row, the next post is also going to be a fiction piece. We’re traveling to a dystopian future where we’ll meet a famous WoW YouTuber.
See you next Sunday!
Amberpine Lodge 